These 2 days, I spent time with a group of people whom I met in my youth. People who sort of made me who I am today. People who helped me so much along the way. Maybe some others might be angry with them but I know that their love for me was genuine, even their love for God's ministry.
About a week ago, somebody almost convinced me that young adults are unable to give so much time to God because of all the commitments we have and evangelism should be left to the youth as they are more on fire and able to influence each other. "Mentorship should be done if the mentor and mentee are comfortable with each other", he said. I didn't argue back. Maybe I just didnt know what to say cuz he sounded reasonable enough.
Yesterday, I listened to the conversation between my ex-leaders. I was amazed at how passionate they still are about reaching the lost souls, about discipling the next batch of leaders, about mentorship. They did not talk about the impossibilities though they know it is tough. They talked about the hows because they knew it still has to be done. I felt awkward in that conversation and I wondered why. It has been a long time since I hear someone talk about God and outreach so passionately.
When I went back, I spoke to a friend about what I felt. She said I can start the fire in my own church. Then I realised I have lost that fire and I want it back. Badly. Without that fire, I cannot pass Him on.
This morning during worship, I told God I'd surrender again. He reminded me of things I have left behind, things that pleases Him. I struggled. During sermon, I was very quiet because I dunno how to answer Him. I felt numb. I felt I have drifted away for too long. I felt unworthy. I felt he cannot use me anymore. Then after cell, I knew one of the new friend was quite ready to accept Christ but not sure about the other one. So I just spoke to the one who was quite ready. I am not good at explaining the bible in Mandarin so I told him I will speak in English since He understood a bit. But the second new friend came and I was challenged as she does not understand English at all. I tried to find help but in vain. So I shared whatever I can n Mandarin. And as God would have it, she decided to accept Christ as her saviour too! Moral of the story? It is really not me. With the 2 new salvations, He just showed me that no matter who or what I ma, He can use me as long as He chooses to and as long as I am willing to take that step of faith. I am humbled once again.
Then when I went to a friend's house in the afternoon (one of them from the dinner table), we had a time of worship and prayer. It was awesome. Been so long since I come so close in His presense even in worship. I miss it so much. I miss just staying and loitering in His presense with no agenda, no issues, just pure reverence.
On the way back, I decided to read my bible. And from there, God gave me a 3 point sermon. Cool. You see, when your heart is right before Him, His blessings just overflow. He can't wait to speak to us! He can't wait to use us!
The lot has been cast. God loves me. I am back. Evangelism is a call for every believer. It is not only for the youth. Young adults, it is time to wake up from our slumber! Do not be deceived that young adulthood means we can conveniently push His work aside! Who are we to say No when He obviously says GO! I love You Jesus. :) Thank You for wanting me back. :)
